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Jay Cutler

9/27/11

5 Things in the NFL That Must be STOPPED

1. Calling Ndamukong Suh dirty -

Detroit Lions Ndamukong Suh

Look at this little baby face! Now is this the face of somebody who would take your QB and throw him around like a rag doll? (hint: the answer is yes)

I’m not prepared to say that Suh is dirty yet. Right now I think he’s exuberant. Excitable. Enthusiastic. Perhaps passionate to a fault. But dirty? No. Suh’s no Hines Ward or Cortland Finnegan. He’s just over zealous sometimes and I think that’s okay. I have a feeling he will learn how to channel it (and get away with it).

2. Thursday Night games — Yeah I said it! Starting week 9 there will be a game every Thursday night for the rest of the season (same as last year). The NFL is in talks to have Thursday night games all season long on a network other than NFLnetwork. I do not want this. Football takes up a lot of my time. And as a person who has no life, but aspires to have one one day, being consumed with football on Sunday, Monday and Thursday is not gonna help me find a husband. Or even a baby daddy, for that matter.

 

 

3. Nnamdi Asomugha’s hair -

Nnamdi got tired of everyone raving about how handsome he is so he decided to put this thing on his head.

Let me start out by saying “no shade” “no offense” “not trying to insult anyone” “just my 2 cents” and all other sorts of disclaimers you give before you say something bordering on mean. I have tried to ignore Nnamdi’s hair because he’s just so darn great otherwise. But today, he was on MSNBC’s Education Nation panel (and did a fabulous job) and his hair was as wrong as ever. I AM FED UP NNAMDI! I have had it up to here with your bullshit.  I want that thing on your head gone by Sunday or you are going to feel the wrath. Sort of. No you won’t. But still. You need to cut that shit off.

4. Rex Grossman -

Washington Redskins Rex Grossman

When Rex speaks I want to make him choose between silence and violence.

Rex Grossman is such douchelord. I hate that term but I don’t know how else to describe him. The more he wins the more miserable it will be for fans across America. He is just annoying. I mean, he really thinks he has HATERS. Rex, you don’t have haters, you have people who’ve watched you play before. Had the Skins beat the Cowboys we would have heard all sorts of unwanted commentary from Rex all week. Even God refused to let that happen. Is there something about the name Rex that requires you to be too chatty for my tastes! Cause Rex Ryan doesn’t exactly soothe my nerves either.

5. Quarterback Injuries - I don’t know how to stop this, but I’m already worn out by Mark Sanchez’s broken nose, Tony Romo’s ribs and lung, Michael Vick’s concussion and bruised-but-you-know-it’s-probably-broken hand, Matt Ryan’s knee, Peyton’s neck, Kerry Collins’ concussion. We haven’t even found out what kind of injury Jay Cutler is definitely going to sustain yet. I just don’t want to see a whole lot of sloppy starting-Quarterbackless football.

I’m open to other things that MUST BE STOPPED, but this is my list.

9/6/11

Sacked: NuVo Will Send a Pack Of Condoms Each Week to The Most Unprotected Quarterback

Chicago Bears Quarterback Jay Cutler poses for magazine

This is my first time really looking at Jay Cutler. He's kinda cute!

Looks like Jay Cutler will have more condoms than he could ever use by the end of the 2011-2012 NFL season. Sports Business Journal reported that starting September 8, NuVo condoms will be sending a pack of condoms to the QB that gets sacked the most that week. Their tagline: If your team can’t protect you, we will??

If last year’s offensive line performances are any indication, Jay Cutler (sacked 52 times last season), Kyle Orton (sacked 34 times in just 13 games), Michael Vick (sacked 34 times in 12 games) will be receiving quite a few packs with Jason Campbell (34) and Phillip Rivers (38) contending for a few as well.

I think this is an interesting marketing ploy. I’d never heard of this condom company until now. I think their sales will definitely be going up soon. They should give Cutler an endorsement. Looks like he recently broke off his engagement. Condoms are staples for those that are single and ready to mingle right???

Related: I’m working on a post about offensive lines, I just haven’t finished it yet. Just wanted to note, it’s not ALWAYS only the O-line’s fault when QBs go down. The more I read and assess and watch film , I see that it’s more complicated than that. Doesn’t take a way from NuVo’s awesome PR move though.

 

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