5 Things in the NFL That Must be STOPPED
1. Calling Ndamukong Suh dirty -
I’m not prepared to say that Suh is dirty yet. Right now I think he’s exuberant. Excitable. Enthusiastic. Perhaps passionate to a fault. But dirty? No. Suh’s no Hines Ward or Cortland Finnegan. He’s just over zealous sometimes and I think that’s okay. I have a feeling he will learn how to channel it (and get away with it).
2. Thursday Night games — Yeah I said it! Starting week 9 there will be a game every Thursday night for the rest of the season (same as last year). The NFL is in talks to have Thursday night games all season long on a network other than NFLnetwork. I do not want this. Football takes up a lot of my time. And as a person who has no life, but aspires to have one one day, being consumed with football on Sunday, Monday and Thursday is not gonna help me find a husband. Or even a baby daddy, for that matter.
3. Nnamdi Asomugha’s hair -
Let me start out by saying “no shade” “no offense” “not trying to insult anyone” “just my 2 cents” and all other sorts of disclaimers you give before you say something bordering on mean. I have tried to ignore Nnamdi’s hair because he’s just so darn great otherwise. But today, he was on MSNBC’s Education Nation panel (and did a fabulous job) and his hair was as wrong as ever. I AM FED UP NNAMDI! I have had it up to here with your bullshit. I want that thing on your head gone by Sunday or you are going to feel the wrath. Sort of. No you won’t. But still. You need to cut that shit off.
4. Rex Grossman -
Rex Grossman is such douchelord. I hate that term but I don’t know how else to describe him. The more he wins the more miserable it will be for fans across America. He is just annoying. I mean, he really thinks he has HATERS. Rex, you don’t have haters, you have people who’ve watched you play before. Had the Skins beat the Cowboys we would have heard all sorts of unwanted commentary from Rex all week. Even God refused to let that happen. Is there something about the name Rex that requires you to be too chatty for my tastes! Cause Rex Ryan doesn’t exactly soothe my nerves either.
5. Quarterback Injuries - I don’t know how to stop this, but I’m already worn out by Mark Sanchez’s broken nose, Tony Romo’s ribs and lung, Michael Vick’s concussion and bruised-but-you-know-it’s-probably-broken hand, Matt Ryan’s knee, Peyton’s neck, Kerry Collins’ concussion. We haven’t even found out what kind of injury Jay Cutler is definitely going to sustain yet. I just don’t want to see a whole lot of sloppy starting-Quarterbackless football.
I’m open to other things that MUST BE STOPPED, but this is my list.