September 2011 Archive

oh wow! You mean there are Cowboys NOT named Tony Romo?

Apparently the Cowboys still enjoy some semblance of being America’s team or whatever cause the Redskins/Cowboys Monday Night Football game got the highest week 3 ratings EVER!  Eva eva? Yes, eva eva. But then again, the NFL is rising in popularity all around so maybe all credit shouldn’t be given to Cowboys marketing and the storied rivalry between them and the Skins.

I fell asleep on this super exciting game right after one of the teams kicked the 5th field goal. Don’t ask me which one cause I don’t like lying in public.

I think the game played out as expected with both defenses playing hard and the stars having a good showing (Demarcus Ware and Brian Orakpo, for example). And at the end, being personified by whichever QB made the last critical mistake. Which in this case was Redskins QB Rex Grossman. I wonder what his haters are saying this morning?

The real story of the week was whether Tony NoNo would play with the cracked rib and miraculously healed punctured lung he sustained in the game against the world famous San Francisco 49ers. And, also,  whether CB Deangelo Hall would take a hurting to any of NoNo’s injuries. Tony delivered. Deangelo lost his package.

I hope Romo doesn’t read a lot of sports sites. Really, no athlete should. But Romo especially given the fact that if he paid attention to what’s said about him even he wouldn’t know what to think of himself.

Romo has been crucified and resurrected more times than any QB in recent memory. I hear there’s a 3rd testament to the bible in the works that covers only Romo’s career. He has been carried to the morgue then dug up and paraded through the streets like a hero several times this season already—and it’s only Week 3.

Why can’t the media just finally decide how fucking good they think Romo is or isn’t and stop taking us on an emotional Romocoaster?

Here’s the real as I see it. As a QB, Romo is…OKAY…GOOD…SOLID…RESPECTABLE. He’s not in my top 10, he’s not elite, but he’s not terrible, embarrassing , middling or below average. He’s just fine. He’s in a comfortable quarterback suite that features a three tier bunk bed with Jay Cutler on top and Mark Sanchez on the bottom. #NoRomo (I’m sorry, but why is his name so much fun!)

Romo makes some critical mistakes at some of the worst times.  Sometimes he wins in spite of them and sometimes he loses badly. That’s what makes him GOOD and not great. But he’s not the only person on the team and he damn sure doesn’t coach himself. Ain’t nothing in this world wrong with having a solid QB. In fact, in this league it’s a blessing.

But back to my point. Romo is 31…he’s not a youngin anymore. We should have decided what we think about him already. But because sports is nothing without superlatives, and “good” just isn’t a good enough in the world of SEO, we are alternately told that Romo is huge disappointment or a gigantic under-appreciated success depending on whether a groundhog sees his shadow that day or not.

Quite frankly, I’m tired of it.

I remember one of my favorite players, Demarcus Ware, complaining about his ranking on the NFL Top 100 players list among other griping about not getting his due. It’s quite possible Ware doesn’t get his due in part because people are too busy talking about Romo to realize there are other Cowboys.

The great talent that is Dez Bryant could barely get a mention until the world found out he was in diamond debt. Nary a peep about Miles Austin until he dated and then promptly dumped hot hottie Kim Kardashian.

The next time people are so inclined to discuss how good Romo is consider it a well-worn NoNo and give some lip service to one of the other Cowboys. Sean Lee perhaps?

1. Calling Ndamukong Suh dirty –

Look at this little baby face! Now is this the face of somebody who would take your QB and throw him around like a rag doll? (hint: the answer is yes)

I’m not prepared to say that Suh is dirty yet. Right now I think he’s exuberant. Excitable. Enthusiastic. Perhaps passionate to a fault. But dirty? No. Suh’s no Hines Ward or Cortland Finnegan. He’s just over zealous sometimes and I think that’s okay. I have a feeling he will learn how to channel it (and get away with it).

2. Thursday Night games — Yeah I said it! Starting week 9 there will be a game every Thursday night for the rest of the season (same as last year). The NFL is in talks to have Thursday night games all season long on a network other than NFLnetwork. I do not want this. Football takes up a lot of my time. And as a person who has no life, but aspires to have one one day, being consumed with football on Sunday, Monday and Thursday is not gonna help me find a husband. Or even a baby daddy, for that matter.

3. Nnamdi Asomugha’s hair –

Nnamdi got tired of everyone raving about how handsome he is so he decided to put this thing on his head.

Let me start out by saying “no shade” “no offense” “not trying to insult anyone” “just my 2 cents” and all other sorts of disclaimers you give before you say something bordering on mean. I have tried to ignore Nnamdi’s hair because he’s just so darn great otherwise. But today, he was on MSNBC’s Education Nation panel (and did a fabulous job) and his hair was as wrong as ever. I AM FED UP NNAMDI! I have had it up to here with your bullshit.  I want that thing on your head gone by Sunday or you are going to feel the wrath. Sort of. No you won’t. But still. You need to cut that shit off.

4. Rex Grossman –

When Rex speaks I want to make him choose between silence and violence.

Rex Grossman is such douchelord. I hate that term but I don’t know how else to describe him. The more he wins the more miserable it will be for fans across America. He is just annoying. I mean, he really thinks he has HATERS. Rex, you don’t have haters, you have people who’ve watched you play before. Had the Skins beat the Cowboys we would have heard all sorts of unwanted commentary from Rex all week. Even God refused to let that happen. Is there something about the name Rex that requires you to be too chatty for my tastes! Cause Rex Ryan doesn’t exactly soothe my nerves either.

5. Quarterback Injuries – I don’t know how to stop this, but I’m already worn out by Mark Sanchez’s broken nose, Tony Romo’s ribs and lung, Michael Vick’s concussion and bruised-but-you-know-it’s-probably-broken hand, Matt Ryan’s knee, Peyton’s neck, Kerry Collins’ concussion. We haven’t even found out what kind of injury Jay Cutler is definitely going to sustain yet. I just don’t want to see a whole lot of sloppy starting-Quarterbackless football.

I’m open to other things that MUST BE STOPPED, but this is my list.

Is Bears QB Jay Cutler thinking about the time he spends lying down in public?

I had to read Chicago  Bears General Manager**Jerry Angelo’s quote a few times to make sure I was seeing the right thing. Angelo said that during the offseason they did everything possible to improve their line. And of the Bears last loss he said:

“We like our eight linemen. That’s not an issue. Injuries happen, and then you have to adjust accordingly. Everything bad that happened on Sunday wasn’t all because of poor offensive line play. Believe me when I tell you that. It was a collective failure. The defense and special teams share part of that as well. So let’s not beat up on the offensive line.”

Lets mince some words here.

1. Just because you believe you did everything you could to improve an offensive line is a separate issue from whether or not the line is good

2. Football is definitely a team game but given how many sacks (not even counting hits or knockdowns) the Bears are allowing Cutler to suffer, you can see where there’d be a domino effect of bad performances.

3. The article mentions they want to try to protect Cutler by balancing the offense between passing and handoffs. But, if so, why isn’t Matt Forte’s contract situation worked out? He was responsible for a high percentage of their offense. And it bears pointing out that RBs have to work with the same O lines that QBs have to work with. Yes a line can be terrible at pass protection and better at run blocking and vice versa, but if Cutler’s sacks are up but Forte’s numbers are down, again that points to issues with the line.

4. If Angelo and others are hinting at Cutler holding the ball too long, I’m not so sure I’m buying that. Ben Roethlisberger and Michael Vick are known  to hold the ball a little extra time because Ben likes to shake defenders and Vick likes to run away from them. Cutler really has no tangible  incentive to hold the ball longer, and if he did I think that it’s something he would have solved after last year’s sack totals. I’m sure, at this point, he’d rather throw a ball away on consecutive downs  than absorb this many blows.

The saga continues I guess.

**Updated. Original post referred to Angelo as owner.

Are football players human beings AT ALL? Doesn't seem like people think so.

It’s barely Week 3 in the NFL and I’ve already seen a bunch of posts on blogs and sites about how people are annoying the hell out of them talking about their Fantasy Football points. I always wonder if people realize how crazy they sound when they talk about how they could have won had they only sat so and so. Or, they picked so and so last year and he didn’t do anything and now he’s balling out.

Kinda makes you wonder if they watch football at all. Football is a VIOLENT sport that is based on MATCHUPs which can change from season to season given the relative PARITY of the NFL. Once you realize this, you understand that winning Fantasy Football is as much about LUCK as it is about skill. In fact, even more so about the luck of the draw. And nobody wants to hear about your good and bad luck every damn week.

Fantasy football has become big business. So much so that the NFL now requires stadiums to post Fantasy updates. That was the first sign that the NFL, too, had lost it’s fantasy football loving ass mind. Can you say “gamblers anonymous?”

The first ad I saw and disliked was last week’s Chris Johnson ad that said “your fantasy picks not performing up to your expectations? Pick again on nfl.com” or something to that effect. A photo of Chris Johnson was on the front of the ad that had him looking so somber you’d think he’d had a bad season. That would be fine…if it wasn’t week fuckin two!

Now this week they come out with this Jamaal Charles ad which is totally and completely inhumane. You can’t tell exactly what injury Charles has in the photo but his face appears swollen due to his cheeks being puffed in pain. And his expression is one of pure agony. If you follow football you know why–the poor man ripped his knee to shreds which ended his season. How this makes anyone MORE concerned about their Fantasy Football leagues and LESS about a player shows the level of detachment we have to this MEN also known as human beings.

I’m not getting all Arian Foster on your ass and telling you not to worry about Fantasy Football at all when players go down. Clearly, lots of you have money at stake. In fact, if there were no money at stake there’d be less incentive for everything surrounding Fantasy Football to be so effing tasteless.

But when the NFL joins the ranks of people who just don’t “get” that portraying one of its own as some lifesize Madden savage is offensive I get worried. It makes me wonder how much they really respect the humanity of these guys who make this game what it is week after week. Do they realize they are using someone’s excruciating pain to promote what is really just a game in the loosest sense of the word?

And for the record, I don’t think it’s any coincidence that the NFL used two dark skinned players with locks for these ads. There is a subconscious association of such black men to violence and beastliness. Brian on twitter pointed out to me that hey probably never would use Peyton Manning for such an ad. I think there’s some validity to that.

15 year League veteran Baltimore Ravens Ray Lewis Looking Spry As Ever.

Already in the league 34 years, Baltimore Ravens Ray Lewis says the signing of Nose Tackle Haloti Ngata to a long term (5 year 61 million!) deal makes him want to play longer for the Ravens. I don’t know how much “longer” is but let’s look at some long careers shall we?

New Orleans Saints Kicker John Kasay has currently been in the league 21 years. Kicker is not such a dangerous position though so that’s either amazing or not-so-amazing. Can’t really say. But 21 years is a long time to do any one thing if you ask me. Even kicking with the way they get fired at the drop of a dime (or bad kick). So for this year Kasay is a strong 5 for 5.

I believe George Blanda still holds the record for longest NFL career at 26 years. He was both a quarterback AND a placekicker. My how the league has changed, can you see Tom Brady kicking one in?

Many offensive lineman last 12 years or more. But not many linebackers make it past that 10 year mark for reasons I think are pretty obvious. When one group of researchers looked at player longevity they, of course, found a strong correlation between position and longevity.

For the 2008 NFL season, 39 percent of the 2004 Combine players were still active. For 1,889 players listed on 32 NFL team rosters, the average longevity was 4.6 years, with only 7 percent of players having experience in the league beyond 10 years. Four of five players with the greatest longevity (>18 yr) were punters or kickers (the other, a rare quarterback).

From these data, the research team discovered orthopedic or health-related factors were not as relevant in predicting longevity. The more prominent factor was where on the field these athletes played.

Specifically, the injuries associated with position showed the strongest link to overall career longevity. Injury locations and diagnoses were shaped by position; for example, offensive lineman had more back and neck injuries while linebackers experienced more shoulder injuries. Most injuries were at the shoulder and knee, with the lower back, neck, foot and ankle also common sites of players’ injury history. Tears were the most common type of injury, followed by dislocations, trauma, fractures and sprains.

With the way Lewis plays, you have to wonder if it’s one of those “Death Becomes Her” situations where Lewis has some serum that keeps him forever young and virile. Something is going on here and I want answers (so I can copy the paper)! I think one thing that worries me about Lewis is that I fear he may be one of those guys that is strong as long as he’s playing and begins to deteriorate pretty quickly the minute he’s done. I hope that’s not the case, I know he keeps one of the toughest off season workout regimens there is and I’m hopeful that we have this big guy around for a long time. Can you imagine his Hall of Fame speech?

In case you’re wondering just how productive Lewis has been, Advanced NFL Stats took a look recently.

The graph is plotted on 2 different axes. The red line is +EPA/G and the green line is SC/G, both of which are plotted with the primary (left) vertical axis. The blue line is +WPA/G and is plotted on the secondary (right) axis.

If the graph ended at 2005, you’d think that Lewis was in the twilight of his career, but he’s been making plays at a very high level since. He peaked somewhere between ’01 and ’03, but there’s been no lasting decline to speak of.

I think this graph probably speaks to Lewis’ comment about Ngata. The stronger the players around him, the better he is able to do his job. He’s not a young guy that can clean up problems for other guys anymore. In order to perform at a high level he needs others to know and perform their jobs well (I think this really applies to any job!).  And as long as he surrounded by talent, there’s probably a starting spot for him on the Ravens roster for the next couple years.

And seriously, how crazy is it to have your dad play football in the NFL while YOU’RE playing in high school.